Sleep Don’t Come Easy

It’s after 3am on this side of the world and I can’t sleep if my life depended on it. Well, it kind of does. It’s just the same thing over and over each and every night. I can’t get control of my mind long enough to keep it quiet so I could sleep. I swear, most of the things that are swirling around in my head don’t make any sense whatsoever and really don’t have anything to do with anything. Just a bunch of irrelevant randomness that I can’t turn off. I’m not stressing about anything, yet I feel really stressed out. I’m so tired, yet I’m not sleepy. I’m not hungry, yet I’m looking for something to eat. This is madness at it’s finest. I literally want to sit here and pull each hair out of my head, one by one so my head can be in so much pain that my mind won’t be able to think about anything else. I feel like I need to scoop my eyeballs out of their sockets and put them in a tall glass of water just to hydrate them. I want to rip my ears off just so they can’t hear how loud and inconsiderate these thoughts are. I know I’m wide awake but it feels like I’m sleep walking as I pace back and forth and up and down the halls of my house. If you look close, you can literally see where the impressions of a trail has been created by my pacing. I don’t want to turn the tv on because I know it will just keep me awake. If I listen to music, I’ll have to where head phones and anyway it’ll just be more voices in my head that I have to listen to. I’m laying here writing about it so I guess this isn’t really helping my situation either. I don’t know, I just don’t know. 😞


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