Puzzle Pieces

It feels like there are so many missing pieces to my life puzzle. I take a step back and notice right away that some of the pieces don’t fit and a lot of them are missing. My reasoning for this is simple, the pieces that don’t fit are the ones that represent me not feeling like I belonged anywhere or not feeling loved and accepted, I was out of place. The missing pieces represent periods of time throughout my childhood that I have no memory of whatsoever. It’s so weird because, I can remember bits and pieces but not all of it. Like, I can remember my first grade teachers name and only one of the kids in that class but I can’t remember anything about first grade. Then the rest of grade school is just all over the place. I don’t have a lot of memories, the few I do have are terrible and the reason why I hated school. Other than that, I couldn’t sit here and tell you stories of my childhood in grade school at all. It makes me wonder if there were any traumatic events that happened to me as a child and maybe I trained my brain to block them out so that I don’t have to relive them or think about it. I don’t know, maybe I’m reading too much into it. Can you remember your years in grade school? I’m sure if your a teen, you probably do remember, but what about those of you who have been out of school for a while now? Do you have any memories of that time? I’m just wondering if it’s common or is there something more to it. I was actually thinking about being hypnotized to see if they could unlock the secrets hidden deep within, at the same time, do I really want to go there. I’m afraid of what might be brought to light. It could be more tragic than what I’m thinking or it could just be nothing at all.

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